If It Walks Like a Duck and Talks Like a Duck Then It's a Quack

Funny, you would think that the phone call I received stating that there was no malignancy detected would bring some relief.  But it doesn't.  Only more questions.  I still have this lump and if it is not a cyst or a tumor then what is it?  The doctor's answer, "if it persists we will make an appointment for a biopsy".  Considering it has been hanging around for nearly a decade doesn't make me think it is going to magically disappear in the next four weeks.  Aces.


I don't put much confidence in the doctors.  I have very good reason.  I don't have a great track record for receiving the right diagnosis.

In 1994, I thought I was suffering a miscarriage.  I was about 9 weeks pregnant by my calculations.  I was having severe pain so I went to the ER where blood was drawn and two separate doctors performed a pelvic exam.  One doctor estimated that I was around 9 weeks and another concluded I was more like 12 weeks.  After hours of being observed and having countless tubes of blood drawn, the same Doctor that gave me the 12 week estimate came back to tell me that I was not pregnant at all.  No explanation.  I still don't have an answer for that one.


 In 1999, I had a cyst on my ovary but was first diagnosed with IBS and sent for a gall bladder scan.  Because my pain is in my lower left quadrant you F-tard, what would lead you to believe that the organ housed in the upper right would be causing my issues?  After that diagnosis, I decided to research my symptoms on the internet and correctly diagnosed myself.  I made an appointment with a Gynecologist where my suspicion was confirmed.  I had surgery to remove the ovary and in the process almost died, spent two weeks in the hospital hooked to a stomach pump while the hospital tried to find a surgeon who would come in and repair the damage that the GYN caused to my intestine during the procedure.  


In 2000, I suffered a miscarriage and shortly after I became pregnant again.  I went to the OB-GYN where they performed a pregnancy test and concluded I was not pregnant and that my HCG level was still elevated from the previous pregnancy.  I insisted I was pregnant and they agreed to do a follow-up test in 10 days.  I was correct.  I was pregnant with Haylee.


Then there was Avery's six day hospital stay for pneumonia.  I took her back to the pediatrician every week for six weeks insisting that she did not have bronchiolitis.  Did they listen?  No.  Not until her oxygen level dropped to 87 and her legs were modeled did they decide that their standard, "It's viral, co-pay please" would just not do.


And of course, When I "lost my mind" in 2007.  Multiple doctors, multiple diagnoses and multiple medications.  I have already went into detail that nightmare.


I think I will always question the expertise of the PHDs.  If that makes me crazy, then so be it. However, I prefer to be called hyper-vigilant.